Trust life a little. I'm trying.

It ain't normal, it ain't recovering. Because I know that I've had enough, I can't swallow anymore, and I'm nearing my limit. It felt as if there's nothing positive about life, seriously. I spent my day, trying to convince myself. It's not working at all.

No one understands and that no one would.

A fucked up life,
A fucked up background,
Everything is just so fucked up.

All you care is about my status. You always claim that you love me, claim that you care for me. But have you ever wondered how long have I swallowed all the sorrow. Look, It's been 3-4 years, why can't you bloody understand the fucking situation I'm in. When can you put yourself in my shoes. When can you understand how I feel when you said all these shits.

I'm sorry, I gotta ignore and leave you. I'm sick and tired of all your nonsense.

I'M BACK FROM CAMP! AND I'M SAD/HAPPY. WILL POST ABOUT MALAYSIA AND CAMP SOON. AND I'LL BE FLYING TO TAIWAN IN 5 DAYS TIME!

It's been so long since I touched this site. I've got soo many things to update about. But I didn't really have the time to do it. It's like I'm really super packed. I've got extra curriculum from 1 nov - 16 nov. Then, I went malaysia from 17 nov - 21 nov. And I'll be having my SLC from 22 nov - 24 nov, 27 nov - 28 nov 3on3 and 30nov-4dec is taiwan trip. You tell me tired anot!

And I've decided to post about the trips etc. But I'm gonna post it after my camp. Basically, I went Bali from 4 nov - 7 nov. It's kind of boring I can say, bcos I went with my parents and my brother. Which is not that fun afterall. I believe if my cousins or friends come along, we wouldn;t be spending hours staying in the room watching disney channel. lol. The things there were pretty expensive and it's flooded with angmoh. And I didn't have the chance to beach, since none of my family members likes the sun. So beaching was out, but I swear that the angmoh babes are hotter than the hunks. Haha, my inspiration. ok, whatever.

Anyway, Malaysia trip was Awesome. though the living condition totally freak me out. Because it suck to the core. I'll update more with photos after my camp.

Please pray for me that everything will go smoothly for the camp. My body is too weak now to take any hiccups. Lol, don't make sense.

Ahhh, i'm sooo tired but I'm gonna survive. Been busy with all the SLC stuff. From dance practise, to meetings and doing proposals till midnight. However, if everything go smoothly during the camp, it's gonna be a very memorable moment. Though i complain about the process of making the camp possible, I enjoy it. Because I know at the end, I'll still miss the busy moments.

Oh well, I'm leaving for malaysia tmr till sunday. And I've got SLC from monday to wednesday. I really really hope that I can survive. Give me some strength. Neeways, we lost to SCGS today. For today play, I'm speechless.

Alright, i'm really tired and my eyes are closing. Will update again after I'm not so busy. Ohya, I received my holiday asignment and I almost "fainted". Full of cheeenaaaa manxzxs. My fav-ou-lert subject.

I HATE HATE HATE GETTING SICK.

especially in this busy month. Zzz..

So many things, so little time.

I need a breather.

you feel me?

SERIOUSLY, JUST FML MAN.

Fml, I bloody touch a lizard with my bare hands when I'm walking down the stairs in the dark. I'm gonna get night mare tonight

Fml, my tutor scolded me like shit bcos of my A maths paper and when I redo the paper, I realise that it's not that hard afterall. Just fml

Fml, my am I always used as my mother's messenger just bcos she's afraid of telling stuff to anyone of my family members and making use of me.

Fml, why am I given this kind of life, where I'm given this difficult situation which I have to control it so that no one gets hurt. But at the end of the day, the one getting tired and all sort of insane stuff is actually me.

I'm in a fucking difficult position now and I'm absolutely unhappy about it. I just hate it in all sorts of ways. You're someone who loves me, who watches me grow up but at the end causing the most misery to me unknowingly. fuck that, why am I always facing this kind of problems and it's always me! I try to be cool about it, I lie to myself that I'm ok with it. But the fact is that it's never ok.

F.M.L